You dug through the closet, found some old overalls, and headed outside to do some cleaning up around the house. In your mind you are thinking how happy the wife will be. "Oh she will love this!", right?
Before you know it, you are greeted by the wife with a bunch of questions. 'Why did you put the old planters pots over there?" or even worse, she doesn't even notice what you did and instead she continues on with her regular routine.
I hear scenerios like this often in therapy. We express love to our partner only to end up being rejected or ignored or unnoticed.
One of the most successful tools I have used with couples that I work with is the 5 Love Languages. Knowing what your partners love language is, is crucial to emotional connection.
It is YOUR JOB to know your partners love language, and to speak it! If their love language is Acts of Service, then it's your job as their partner to speak their language.
Once couples understand this philosophy (and I have really simplied it for this very short blog!) they then can grow closer together, speaking a love language that their partner actually understands.
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