Therapy for when life sucks!

call or text now:  905.484.3388

book your appointment now:  click here

 

Providing relationship counselling to couples & individuals

848 Fennell Ave E, Hamilton

MENU

  • We moved!

    I am excited to announce our new office location!  And I think clients will appreciate the new space too!

    Though I have enjoyed my time on Pearl Street, it was time to move.  My new space has more parking, wider streets, easy access to main roads and bus routes, waiting room, self-signin and is located within a multi-disciplinary building.

    The address of 848 Fennell Avenue East, up on the East Hamilton Mountain.  I am inside the Pathway to Healthy and Wealthy Living building, corner of Fennell and East 32nd Street.  Here you will find several options to improve your health and wealth.  Who doesn't need that?!  Services include massages, energy work, speech therapy, social work, homeopathic services, mortgages, lending and financial planning.  And of course, myself, relationship counselling.  (to learn more about the services offered here at Pathway to Healthy and Wealthy Living, click here.....)

    If you are thinking about making an appointment for counselling, there are many options.  You can call me, text me, email me or you can book yourself in by using the online calendar.  When you arrive to the office you will find on-site parking and street parking.  Just watch the signs for street parking, they alternate which side of the road you can park on.  Read carefully - it's pretty confusing!  Walk in through the main doors at the front.  When you enter, you will see a self signin i-pad on the left.  Kindly sign yourself in and have a seat.  When I am ready, I will come down to meet you.

    Your Inner SOULutions provides affordable and professional counselling to individuals and couples who are needing help in their relationships.  Interactive and solution focused.  Direct, no "lingo" approach.  

  • 3 Pillars of Secure Functioning

    Okay, let's break down that title first:

    3 Pillars:  well, what I think of when I hear the word pillars is one of those old mansions or buildings I see in those small hidden-away towns.  Often times they use to be a hospital or clinic or some rich builders' home.  In the front there are huge pillars that looks like they are keeping the roof from collapsing.  The size and strength of them is recognizable right from the curb.  

    Secure Functioning:  secure = safe, predictable, reliable.  Functioning = every day life in a relationship

    So, 3 pillars of secure functioning, to me, means 3 strong and useful ways to ensure a safe and reliable relationship

    So, what are they?  Here it is:

    1. I am the top priority in YOUR life, and you are in MINE
    2. We make decisions TOGETHER
    3. We HELP each other feel better when distressed (even if we are the cause of it!)

    These 3 pillars of strength, safety, security and predictability is what holds up marriages during the good times and the bad.  Ensuring priorities are straight, respecting each others opinions and feelings when making decisions and being that person that your partner can rely on to help them feel better during stressful times.  

    I believe if any of these pillars are missing, your roof will come down.  Maybe not today.  But it will.

  • 3 Things To Do After A breakup

    Your long-term relationship with that guy just ended.  It was a horrible experience and you are so glad to be out of there!   On to the next one................  but wait!  Read this first!

    To minimize the risk of landing back into an unhealthy relationship, make sure you do these 3 things:

    1. Feel it!  Go through all the emotions.  You know, the anger and the crying and the self-doubting.  Do it all.  The break up is often compared to losing a loved one through death.  There is a healthy process that one must go through in order to heal.  So, go ahead and feel everything you feel.  
    2. Take ownership!  What was YOUR part in the breakdown?  How did YOU contribute to the falling apart of what was suppose to be a "match made in heaven"?  Write it down.  Got half a page?  Keep writing.  And write some more.  At the end, you should have 2...maybe 3 full pages (and no, not double or triple spaced!) of how your actions, or lack of action, played a part in the breakup.  This step is crucial.  Don't skip through it in one sitting.  This should be a lengthy process, perhaps taking 6 to 12 months or more to complete.  Yes, I am serious!
    3. Find the pattern!  This was likely NOT your first break up.  And, it is very likely that there is a pattern between this last one and the one before that, and the one before that.  What type of person do you seem to be attracted to?  And why?  What is it about YOU that attracts YOU to this type of relationship?  What are your expectations?  Your dreams?  And why is it that you have always sacraficed your expectations and dreams in order to feel love?  If you don't figure out this step, it is very likely that you will end up back in the same situation, just with a different guy.

    These 3 steps are healthy and proactive way to heal your wounds and get yourself back up, all dusted off, and ready to take on a more rewarding relationship.  These are 3 important steps.  Don't overlook it.  Don't think you are an exception.  Give yourself the time and space to move through these 3 healthy self-care steps.  I mean, 3 years after a break up is a healthy chunk of time to do the individual work for a happier, healthier you.

    Need help?  Give me a shout.  I enjoy working with couples with their relationships, marriages and post-relationships.